Is Their Anything Wrong Building With A Man?
I have been with a guy who earns as little as 37k and some few naira as his basic salary.
He gave me his pay slip. I know of his every income. Month ends, he would come straight to see me with it and say “Baby, what do we do with this, this is my salary”…
We would sit together and plan it, that is after he must have removed his tithe. He doesn’t joke with that one. Lol
I had walked in on him and his friends once where they were yabbing him, they said that he was being foolish to be showing his woman his pay slip and even giving all to me, that he should man up and change else l would drain him and render him useless…
He replied, “I know what l am doing, l don’t even earn much yet, it is wise she knows, if she likes, let her finish it, she knows l don’t have money anywhere again after this, so she won’t come back for demands”
One thing about him is, he was a very good listener, he was teachable, he was willing to do more for himself, he was humble and goal oriented so it wasn’t hard for me to build with him.
When we planned our wedding, l didn’t have any fear. He was hardworking, l was an undergraduate but not lazy either, l was doing part time jobs at a studio to help myself through school too.
When he had one major breakthrough, he called me, we sat together and planned towards it. Before you know it, situations changed, we got a land and had started building. We were doing fine, like very very fine….
Then he died… Sickness took him. He died some months to our wedding.
Now my point is this, there is nothing wrong building with a man. There is nothing wrong being with a man who earns below expectations.
No man would wish to not be able to comfortably provide for his home. Except he is an imbecile, no man will wish to be poor.
But as you decide to build with him, first make sure he has SENSE!
See, no matter how much you build with an idiot, he will never appreciate you. The traits are always there. They show it too often but love will not make you know.
Meanwhile, no man will be willing to reveal all his earnings to a materialistic woman too. A woman whose only purpose is to spend, buy cloths and shoes, with nothing valuable to add to him.
Show a man you can be trusted. Show a man you can stand in his absence. Prove to him you are a builder and not a waster… If he is not stupid or just using you, he will reveal even his deepest secrets to you.
Forget all these social media stuffs where women will come here to confuse you with “I cannot marry a man who earns below 50k”, it is okay to set standards for yourself, but don’t make it general.
Not all men will make it big before they marry. Not all men will buy a car before they marry. Do NOT lose a good man because of his temporary situation.
(C) Ekonyohe Daniels